Mary Jo McCabe
Building Relationships
If you want to know the meaning of your life and the power that it brings, look back into your past. See all the joys, sorrows and lessons you learned from all the people you have ever had relationships with. Sometimes their presence doesn’t seem to mean much, because you believe that another’s words are exactly that--their words, their attitude...but that's definitly not the case.
Each person represents a part of you.
What someone says to you and the feelings and attitudes behind those words is in reality, a reflection of a part of you. For example, your best friend might be critical of you at lunch. While she might be experiencing something in her life that's making her feel less than perfect, her words and attitudes are also showing you that you have been acting critically toward yourself or toward others. Your first reaction might be to fire back and give her a piece of your mind or walk away hurt.
When working on a relationship, the key is to look at how it is put together. Learn to look at the “stitches” that created it to know how important it is to you. All relationships must be worked through. A long-lasting relationship requires both of you to stand up to it when things get tough. If you want it to last, you must be lenient in whatever it brings, and keep yourself motivated to say within it.
Know, however, that in time every relationship, or set of "stitches," dissolves in its own way. The threads that bound you at the beginning may no longer be needed. There may come a time when you have outgrown the relationship because you have learned everythhing you can from it.
You came into life to build a foundation of friendship.
The Mystery of Each Other
Whether it’s a friendship, a love or a parenting relationship--relationships are created because of a need that must be met. All relationships begin with emotions. Even though you do not always open your heart to it, the feelings of the relationship are the source of its power. Each relationship has the power to give you what you need, but emotional ones are the most powerful. Those relationships will always help you grow more than those you mentally connect to.
To create a lasting relationship that can help you find a stronger foundation within you, look at the person in the relationship. Hear what they say and how they say it, and recognize them as part of you. That will give you a clue as to what part of your character they represent.
Learn to forgive the emotions of the past.
Many times souls are returned to your life, but not in the same person who harmed you in the past. Their words and actions, however, seem so familiar. for example, the same attitude, the same temper, the same unforgiving nature continue showing up in other people until you are able to interpret the emotions that stir within you when you are with them. Look at all the faces in your life and determine what you need from each of them, because believe it or not, all relationships eventually become partnerships.
All Successful Relationships Grow Into Partnerships
Let's take parents and their children, for instance. At some point, the child becomes the parent. As that begins to happen, the child doesn’t see it, but the parent begins to feel drawn to the child for reasons like age, infirmity, financial needs, loneliness, etc. Eventually the relationship grows into a partnership. That is why it is hard to determine which is most important to you, because each partnership creates another string to weave into your life’s tapestry.
To create better relationships, look for you in each person you meet. Know what you need from each relationship. More importantly, know what sparks hope, what give you a purpose. If you do not have a reason to live, you become spiritually lost. If you do not feel a purpose, you are alone. By looking to others, you beg to own a partnership within your life and grow into the person you are today.
The baggage another person carries is there for you to help him support him and you. Your criticisms of another—even unspoken ones—can create hardships and a lack of hope. It will eventually whittle away at the relationship.
All partnerships and relationships must find hope. Each must provide joy by the lesson it gives. Imagine you are a lost child, trying to find a familiar face. When you see no one familiar, you start opening to new voices and new faces to help you. Start each day with a face that does not feel familiar. Look for that one spark of hope in each other that gives more depth to your personality.
All relationships are developed from kindness and destroyed from criticism. Become more “in tune” with what lies deep within you and the voice that comes from you. What spark creates the words you use? What heartache is behind your words? Paying attention to the reason you are saying things the way you do will help you understand the role you play to each other.
There are many ways to express yourself:
You can become the teacher and know that the value of your words is monumental to those who seek to hear you.
You can become the healer and show sensitivity that encourages others to love themselves and feel blessed by others.
You can become the student and learn, listen and feel by connecting to others.
You can become the master of timeand seek to live long and brinhg history into the world.
Lighten the hearts you touch.
You do that not with heartache and disappointment, but with love and acceptance. You willnever heal your heart by wanting to pull away from those you love or hurt those who have hurt you. It is through your feelings that you will heal and become a whole person. Being critical of others will do no good. Accept the relationship you have created and your role in it. Your relationships with others and the emotions tied to them will help you grow into the person you need to be today.
Want to schedule a private reading with Mary Jo? Call 850-897-5872. Click here for a description of services offered.